Currently house-hoppin' in Ottawa.
Avoiding parents, negative people, bill collectors and responsibilities.
Dying to blog about things that can't be leaked on to the eyes of strangers on the web.
Obsessing over polyvore.
Listening to an ode to my former destructive life with *Matt : Lesson Learned by Alicia Keys and John Mayer.
Trying to let anger fade and forgiveness take over.
Missing the only person I feel like talking to from Montreal : *Grace.
Wanting to be in my boyfriend's bed.
Waiting for the art museum to open.
Thinking about walking to the mall for Starbucks and a bagel.
Anticipating a weekend in Montreal with the girls for my 21st.
Amazed at how fast the years went by.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
Life is a Gift:Part 1
Wait, for now.
Distrust everything, if you have to.
But trust the hours.
Haven't they carried you everywhere, up to now?
Personal events will become interesting again.
Hair will become interesting.
Pain will become interesting.
Buds that open out of season will become lovely again.
Second-hand gloves will become lovely again,
Their memories are what give them the need for other hands.
And the desolation of lovers is the same: that enormous emptiness.
Carved out of such tiny beings as we are asks to be filled
The need for the new love is faithfulness to the old.
Wait.
Don't go too early.
You're tired. But everyone's tired.
But no one is tired enough.
Only wait a while and listen.
Music of hair,
Music of pain,
music of looms weaving all our loves again.
Be there to hear it, it will be the only time,
most of all to hear,
the flute of your whole existence,
rehearsed by the sorrows, play itself into total exhaustion.
You inspire me to be a stronger person. You've taught me to be a better person without even trying. I am so proud of what you've achieved and what you've overcame. Nothing will ever come between us. Don't give up. You and I threw out our bibles years ago, but how can I not have faith in God when after last week you still stand beside me?
Current...
Mood: Grateful
Song:Meet me halfway-Black Eyed Peas
Distrust everything, if you have to.
But trust the hours.
Haven't they carried you everywhere, up to now?
Personal events will become interesting again.
Hair will become interesting.
Pain will become interesting.
Buds that open out of season will become lovely again.
Second-hand gloves will become lovely again,
Their memories are what give them the need for other hands.
And the desolation of lovers is the same: that enormous emptiness.
Carved out of such tiny beings as we are asks to be filled
The need for the new love is faithfulness to the old.
Wait.
Don't go too early.
You're tired. But everyone's tired.
But no one is tired enough.
Only wait a while and listen.
Music of hair,
Music of pain,
music of looms weaving all our loves again.
Be there to hear it, it will be the only time,
most of all to hear,
the flute of your whole existence,
rehearsed by the sorrows, play itself into total exhaustion.
You inspire me to be a stronger person. You've taught me to be a better person without even trying. I am so proud of what you've achieved and what you've overcame. Nothing will ever come between us. Don't give up. You and I threw out our bibles years ago, but how can I not have faith in God when after last week you still stand beside me?
Current...
Mood: Grateful
Song:Meet me halfway-Black Eyed Peas
Monday, November 9, 2009
The September Issue
The skinniest and most powerful woman in America : Anna Wintour.I watched The September Issue last night. It follows Anna, Grace Coddington (creative director) and the Vogue Elite throughout the making of their September 2007 issue.
Anna is just as famous for her icy persona than her impeccable style. Some of her colleagues have even donned her Nuclear Wintour. After watching this documentary I say,"Let the haters hate Miss Wintour." She definitely isn't warm and friendly, but the woman is the best at what she does. Anna basically runs the fashion industry...what do you expect?
I absolutely loved,"The September Issue". If you love fashion, you will love this film. And I mean real fashion lovers, not you little shitheads who like spending time at the fucking mall. By the way, you can find this flim online ;)
Current...
Mood:Content
Song:Number 1 by R.Kelly and Keri Hilson
Your Man is Cheating on You!
Lately I've been trying to break out of my vampire-like sleeping pattern. What a fail. I tried to fall asleep at 3 am (I usually sleep at around 7-8 am) but I hadn't heard from *C all day. Ok, I know that sounds pathetic. But the man has called me before he goes to bed ever since August. Never missed a night, unless we were sleeping in the same bed of course. It's Saturday night so I'm thinking maybe he went to the club. But he never clubs without informing me first. (For the record, I'm not a psycho girlfriend... he does this without me asking.I actually encourage him to go out.I got people all over the city anyway.) Throughout the night I called him twice and messaged him once on msn .No reply. I'm actually getting worried something has happened to him at this point.
I walk into the kitchen. A certain book on the shelf catches my eye. It's called, "The Ultimate Sex Test" by Smith and Doe. We bought it from Value Village as a joke for a friend last year. I decide to flip through it to take my mind of the situation. Bad idea. The first thing I read is:
Our shocking research for WHAT MEN DON'T WANT WOMEN TO KNOW proved that fully 96.4 % of all men either have cheated, are currently cheating, or believe they will cheat in the future. This is a fact of life. If you don't believe it, ask Sally Jesse Raphael.
I'm like okay bud...Sally Jesse Raphael? I chuckle and read on.
Although your first response will probably be to grant our figures are true for men in general, you will think, not your man. Think again. Unless he is chained in the basement, hopelessly gay, or pitifully dysfunctional, it is your man!
I'm thinking. Whatever. I've known my man since High School. He's not a cheater. He respects me and women in general way too much. 96.4 % eh? Come to think about it... all of my girlfriends have had their asses cheated on by their boyfriends. Shit. *C hasn't called me. It's Saturday night. Fuck. Man, I should've gone to the Afterhours Club with *Kelly and *Matt is what I'm thinking. I decide to call him one more time. It's around 4 am. He picks up sounding awfully groggy. I try to play it cool and nonchallantly ask him where he's been all night. He says out with the boys, but his story isn't adding up and he's starting to stutter and mumble all over the fuckin' place. So I call him out on it. I ask him why is he stuttering so much. He sighs and says fine I'll tell you. Wow, here it goes. Another fuckin' woman scorned. He says... I puked all night. I can feel the embarassment in this voice. I start crackin' up so much, I must have woken up a neighbour or two. He starts laughing his ass off too and says it was on the same level as boat cruise. (He came to my prom aftergrad where I made him chug a bottle of vodka with me before we got on a boat for the rest of the night.) We talk on the phone for a little longer, just talking about our day/night and how we plan on playing matchmaker for a couple friends of ours.
I go back to reading the book before bed.
Meditation of the Day
"A man stranded on a desert island who will not have sex with a chicken is not man enough for me"
The fuck! If my man fucks a chicken then he's good enough for me? Hahahaha. This is probably the funniest book I've read. Ever. I've decided to dedicate a weekly post to it called : The UST Lesson of The Week. I'm actually serious. It's too funny to keep to myself.
Current...
Mood:Sleepy
Song:Simple kind of Life by No doubt
I walk into the kitchen. A certain book on the shelf catches my eye. It's called, "The Ultimate Sex Test" by Smith and Doe. We bought it from Value Village as a joke for a friend last year. I decide to flip through it to take my mind of the situation. Bad idea. The first thing I read is:
Our shocking research for WHAT MEN DON'T WANT WOMEN TO KNOW proved that fully 96.4 % of all men either have cheated, are currently cheating, or believe they will cheat in the future. This is a fact of life. If you don't believe it, ask Sally Jesse Raphael.
I'm like okay bud...Sally Jesse Raphael? I chuckle and read on.
Although your first response will probably be to grant our figures are true for men in general, you will think, not your man. Think again. Unless he is chained in the basement, hopelessly gay, or pitifully dysfunctional, it is your man!
I'm thinking. Whatever. I've known my man since High School. He's not a cheater. He respects me and women in general way too much. 96.4 % eh? Come to think about it... all of my girlfriends have had their asses cheated on by their boyfriends. Shit. *C hasn't called me. It's Saturday night. Fuck. Man, I should've gone to the Afterhours Club with *Kelly and *Matt is what I'm thinking. I decide to call him one more time. It's around 4 am. He picks up sounding awfully groggy. I try to play it cool and nonchallantly ask him where he's been all night. He says out with the boys, but his story isn't adding up and he's starting to stutter and mumble all over the fuckin' place. So I call him out on it. I ask him why is he stuttering so much. He sighs and says fine I'll tell you. Wow, here it goes. Another fuckin' woman scorned. He says... I puked all night. I can feel the embarassment in this voice. I start crackin' up so much, I must have woken up a neighbour or two. He starts laughing his ass off too and says it was on the same level as boat cruise. (He came to my prom aftergrad where I made him chug a bottle of vodka with me before we got on a boat for the rest of the night.) We talk on the phone for a little longer, just talking about our day/night and how we plan on playing matchmaker for a couple friends of ours.
I go back to reading the book before bed.
Meditation of the Day
"A man stranded on a desert island who will not have sex with a chicken is not man enough for me"
The fuck! If my man fucks a chicken then he's good enough for me? Hahahaha. This is probably the funniest book I've read. Ever. I've decided to dedicate a weekly post to it called : The UST Lesson of The Week. I'm actually serious. It's too funny to keep to myself.
Current...
Mood:Sleepy
Song:Simple kind of Life by No doubt
Friday, November 6, 2009
Msn on a Friday Night
*Shaniqua says:
interesting
you know rihanna is a pisces
"its fine, i want to have a good career"
lmao
*him
She means " its fine, i want him to have a good career" quoting Rihanna on a comment she made about Chris Brown in a recent interview.
*Nina says:
lool
i love her
i used to not like her,cuz she was a market machine
*marketing
*Shaniqua says:
so after she got punched in the face, shes ok lol?
just playin
*Nina says:
shes human now
haha
so yea
and she has great stylee
and her songs are so catchy
*Shaniqua says:
shes def a boss
*Nina says:
how bout a round of applause?
whos gonna run this town tonight?
its like im checking into rehab?
so real
Current...
Mood:Content
Song:The Police and The Private by Metric
interesting
you know rihanna is a pisces
"its fine, i want to have a good career"
lmao
*him
She means " its fine, i want him to have a good career" quoting Rihanna on a comment she made about Chris Brown in a recent interview.
*Nina says:
lool
i love her
i used to not like her,cuz she was a market machine
*marketing
*Shaniqua says:
so after she got punched in the face, shes ok lol?
just playin
*Nina says:
shes human now
haha
so yea
and she has great stylee
and her songs are so catchy
*Shaniqua says:
shes def a boss
*Nina says:
how bout a round of applause?
whos gonna run this town tonight?
its like im checking into rehab?
so real
Current...
Mood:Content
Song:The Police and The Private by Metric
Wordle
© 2009 Jonathan Feinberg
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Discovered another fun thing to do to pass the time... It's a website where you make word collages. Above is a NinaNovaBlog collage.I lovesss :) So super easy. Make one yourself at www.wordle.net
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Corny
Dedicated to *C:
People ask if I'm in love with you.
Because I'm sitting here with your picture and smiling to myself.
I'm kinda lost in my own thoughts of you.
My heart speaks before my mind thinks through and I blush as I say yes.
Your lips, your eyes, your smile, your kiss...
I must admit it's a part of me.
You please me, completely, believe me.
Like a melody.
Your soul, your flow, your youth, your truth is simply proof.
We were meant to be.
But the best quality that's hookin' me.
Is that you're loving me for me
People ask why I'm in love with you.
Well, let me start by saying.
You got my heart by just being who you are.
And what we got is between me and you.
Unconditionally you're there for me
Undeniably you inspire me, spiritually, oh so sweet.
This is meaningful, it's incredible, pleasurable, unforgettable.
The way I feel, so surreal
Its so amazing how something so sweet.
Has come and rearranged my life.
I've been kissed by destiny.
Oh, heaven came and saved me.
An angel was placed at my feet.
This isn't ordinary, he's loving me for me.
*Stripped of all make up, no need for fancy clothes.
No cover ups, push ups.
With him, I dont have to put on a show.
He loves every freckle, every curve, every inch of my skin.
Fulfilling me entirely, taking all of me in.
He's real, he's honesty, and he's loving me for me.
I woke up this morning and *C was gone to do work. As I anxiously waited his return, I watched the Hills. He came back with a smile on his face and said, "I love you. I'm sorry if you went to sleep mad last night." After last night, and seeing me for dayss with the same outfit and no makeup this guy still loves me? This must be the real deal.
Current...
Mood:Loved
Song:L'amour by Carla Bruni
City:Montreal
People ask if I'm in love with you.
Because I'm sitting here with your picture and smiling to myself.
I'm kinda lost in my own thoughts of you.
My heart speaks before my mind thinks through and I blush as I say yes.
Your lips, your eyes, your smile, your kiss...
I must admit it's a part of me.
You please me, completely, believe me.
Like a melody.
Your soul, your flow, your youth, your truth is simply proof.
We were meant to be.
But the best quality that's hookin' me.
Is that you're loving me for me
People ask why I'm in love with you.
Well, let me start by saying.
You got my heart by just being who you are.
And what we got is between me and you.
Unconditionally you're there for me
Undeniably you inspire me, spiritually, oh so sweet.
This is meaningful, it's incredible, pleasurable, unforgettable.
The way I feel, so surreal
Its so amazing how something so sweet.
Has come and rearranged my life.
I've been kissed by destiny.
Oh, heaven came and saved me.
An angel was placed at my feet.
This isn't ordinary, he's loving me for me.
*Stripped of all make up, no need for fancy clothes.
No cover ups, push ups.
With him, I dont have to put on a show.
He loves every freckle, every curve, every inch of my skin.
Fulfilling me entirely, taking all of me in.
He's real, he's honesty, and he's loving me for me.
I woke up this morning and *C was gone to do work. As I anxiously waited his return, I watched the Hills. He came back with a smile on his face and said, "I love you. I'm sorry if you went to sleep mad last night." After last night, and seeing me for dayss with the same outfit and no makeup this guy still loves me? This must be the real deal.
Current...
Mood:Loved
Song:L'amour by Carla Bruni
City:Montreal
This is Shit
Last night I watched,"This is it", with *C. Loved it. I was bobbin' my head and tappin' my toes throughout the whole thing. *Lourdes and *Carlo were also there watching Paranormal Activity, so I finally got my things! Yayy for me. Sex/Food/Movies/More sex=Good fuckin' Day. Then I got back to *C's and checked my inbox. Got this lovely message:
1. You are a jerk, I had to go to the hospital alone and you said you would come with me. It was an extremely unpleasant experience.
2. Your mother is calling me, *Matt and *Kelly NON stop and we are sick and tired of lying for you.
We are not going to do it anymore.Your mother is almost crying on the phone, she actually showed up in Montreal and all she wants to do is give you money and she bought you groceries. You are being a shitty friend. You are 20 years old and you are acting like a child. You should probably talk to your roommate, she is not amused.
*Elle
To her I replied:
I'm sorry that my mother was hounding you guys. I'm even more sorry that I didn't go to your appointment, I couldn't get back to the city until today.
And as for the rest, I'm an amazing friend to those who appreciate and deserve it. I don't approve of your name-calling via Facebook . If you think I have a problem or have a problem with me, you should talk to me about it in a productive manner. To me, that's what good friends do. For the record, telling me I should talk to my roomate... That's a pretty snarky remark *Elle. I'm obviously going to talk to her. We live together? Whatever she's upset with, she and I can talk about it. It doesn't really concern you.
On a lighter note, I finally got my hair cut the other day. :)
Peace & Love
*Nina
Ugh. And that's all I have to say about that really.
I'm famous for my honesty. It really comes and bites me in the ass sometimes though. So, the night wears on... *C and I start talking about past sexual experiences/partners. Which was actually quite fun until... He tells me how he slept with my friend *Rina I tell him that I slept with his old buddy *Michael during the Christmas holidays last year. Not a good idea. After what seemed like an eternity of silence, he says," I'm gonna fuck *Sarah (Michael's on-again off- again gf) or Michael's gonna get what's coming to him." How am I supposed to answer to that? I tell him neither. I love you. Please don't do this. I was a slut. My bad. We go to bed.
Current...
Mood:Neutral
Somg:Houston by Dean Martin
1. You are a jerk, I had to go to the hospital alone and you said you would come with me. It was an extremely unpleasant experience.
2. Your mother is calling me, *Matt and *Kelly NON stop and we are sick and tired of lying for you.
We are not going to do it anymore.Your mother is almost crying on the phone, she actually showed up in Montreal and all she wants to do is give you money and she bought you groceries. You are being a shitty friend. You are 20 years old and you are acting like a child. You should probably talk to your roommate, she is not amused.
*Elle
To her I replied:
I'm sorry that my mother was hounding you guys. I'm even more sorry that I didn't go to your appointment, I couldn't get back to the city until today.
And as for the rest, I'm an amazing friend to those who appreciate and deserve it. I don't approve of your name-calling via Facebook . If you think I have a problem or have a problem with me, you should talk to me about it in a productive manner. To me, that's what good friends do. For the record, telling me I should talk to my roomate... That's a pretty snarky remark *Elle. I'm obviously going to talk to her. We live together? Whatever she's upset with, she and I can talk about it. It doesn't really concern you.
On a lighter note, I finally got my hair cut the other day. :)
Peace & Love
*Nina
Ugh. And that's all I have to say about that really.
I'm famous for my honesty. It really comes and bites me in the ass sometimes though. So, the night wears on... *C and I start talking about past sexual experiences/partners. Which was actually quite fun until... He tells me how he slept with my friend *Rina I tell him that I slept with his old buddy *Michael during the Christmas holidays last year. Not a good idea. After what seemed like an eternity of silence, he says," I'm gonna fuck *Sarah (Michael's on-again off- again gf) or Michael's gonna get what's coming to him." How am I supposed to answer to that? I tell him neither. I love you. Please don't do this. I was a slut. My bad. We go to bed.
Current...
Mood:Neutral
Somg:Houston by Dean Martin
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Fartsy
Went to go get my hair did at the salon aujourd'hui. While waiting for *C, I was reading Elle October '09, where they featured Cedric Rivrain. Monsieur Rivrain does the most amzing fashion illustrations. Above is the lovely Kate Moss in Alexander McQueen. You can check his shit out at CedricRivrain.com !p.s. Still no clothes. yup. Apparently it's in a crackhead's car who may be out of town.Sadly,this is not an exageration...
Current..
Mood:Anxious
Song:Scared of Lonely by Beyonce
Monday, November 2, 2009
Nasty Girl
**Update
Lourdes replies via text yesterday:
Blame it on the a-a-a-alcohol.
Everything is all good in Nina land except the fact I am still in my Boyfriend's clothes. Going on day two. Ain't karma a bitch?
Current...
Mood: Neutral
Song:Sound of cars on the highway
Lourdes replies via text yesterday:
Blame it on the a-a-a-alcohol.
Everything is all good in Nina land except the fact I am still in my Boyfriend's clothes. Going on day two. Ain't karma a bitch?
Current...
Mood: Neutral
Song:Sound of cars on the highway
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Drama
The Hills ain't got nothing on me. I woke up this morning with a major headache. Blue Marks all over my body. A guilty conscience. And the only piece of clothing with me right now that is not wet is my thong. Holy hairy balls. Let me take you through my night.
The day started off pretty harmless. I went to the costume shop with *Lourdes and a couple of other people. By the time we had finished it was almost 9 pm and time for transformation! I went from frumpy and fugly to Pussy Cat Doll in the matter of 2 hours. We ended up leaving the house at 11ish and didn't have time to drink, so we drank in the car and on the way to the club. When we got there the line up almost went around the fucking block! Luckily, a couple of our friends had VIP there. But unluckily for me, the bouncer was hating on me because he saw me drinking in the line. As he turned his head, I booked it past him. I felt like McLovin."I'm innn". Off to the entrance fee where once again I ran past another bouncer with *Lourdes.We were in the Party-hoe Olympics.
Once I was in, I did the rounds. Said hi to some Jabawockeez, Prisoners, Cops and I was off to find the rest of my PCD girls. As I'm walking towards the booth I see that my ex-bff/roomie *Tina is with the ladies. Guhhhh. (Our friendship ended on the note that she was leaving the city and thought I was an alcoholic ) I decided to squash this unecessary beef between us! I told her that I was in fact sober at the moment, was not an "alcoholic" anymore and that I missed her. It was a very Heidi/Lauren at the club moment. Only she didn't yell "You know what you did!" repeatedly. She just gave me a very unimpressed look and said Okayyyy. Ugh. Now I remember why we stopped being friends. She's such a bitch! A quality I once loved about her, until the bitchiness was directed towards me. After that uncomfortable conversation, you knowww I was hittin' up the bar.
A few double gin and tonics with jaggerbombs later...I was feeling good! Dancing it up with my people and yelling profanities is what I do best. This is the part where shit gets bananas. *Lourdes comes up and pours a jug of juice all over me. This goes back in forth between us a few times. Until she throws it in my face and my lash glue starts to burn the eyes. I push her to the ground and pour drinks all over her. Everyone around us, including bouncers, watch in what I'm thinking was amusement. She storms off and I proceed to drink and dance with *C, *Jiji and *Tia. After another fight breaks out the lights turn on and it was time to leave. As I look to the street I see *Lourdes crying and being comforted by *Dina and *Diane. Ugh. I feel so bad. I made my bestfriend cry! Who does that? Everyone decides to meet back at the hood.
*Lourdes and her boyfriend * Carlo never showed up. They have all my things. Clothes. Makeup. Toothbrush! Shit... Anyways, I wake up this morning at 9 after 2 hours of sleep and remembered what happened. I sent Lourdes the following text:
Hey.
I'm really sorry about last night.
Sooo unecessary.
Bff?
Harammm *lourdes!
Now I can't sleep and am wondering how long I can last with only a thong and my Boyfriend's shirt on. I hate this saying, but... FUCK MY LIFE!
Current...
Mood:Guilt
Song:*C's snoring symphony
The day started off pretty harmless. I went to the costume shop with *Lourdes and a couple of other people. By the time we had finished it was almost 9 pm and time for transformation! I went from frumpy and fugly to Pussy Cat Doll in the matter of 2 hours. We ended up leaving the house at 11ish and didn't have time to drink, so we drank in the car and on the way to the club. When we got there the line up almost went around the fucking block! Luckily, a couple of our friends had VIP there. But unluckily for me, the bouncer was hating on me because he saw me drinking in the line. As he turned his head, I booked it past him. I felt like McLovin."I'm innn". Off to the entrance fee where once again I ran past another bouncer with *Lourdes.We were in the Party-hoe Olympics.
Once I was in, I did the rounds. Said hi to some Jabawockeez, Prisoners, Cops and I was off to find the rest of my PCD girls. As I'm walking towards the booth I see that my ex-bff/roomie *Tina is with the ladies. Guhhhh. (Our friendship ended on the note that she was leaving the city and thought I was an alcoholic ) I decided to squash this unecessary beef between us! I told her that I was in fact sober at the moment, was not an "alcoholic" anymore and that I missed her. It was a very Heidi/Lauren at the club moment. Only she didn't yell "You know what you did!" repeatedly. She just gave me a very unimpressed look and said Okayyyy. Ugh. Now I remember why we stopped being friends. She's such a bitch! A quality I once loved about her, until the bitchiness was directed towards me. After that uncomfortable conversation, you knowww I was hittin' up the bar.
A few double gin and tonics with jaggerbombs later...I was feeling good! Dancing it up with my people and yelling profanities is what I do best. This is the part where shit gets bananas. *Lourdes comes up and pours a jug of juice all over me. This goes back in forth between us a few times. Until she throws it in my face and my lash glue starts to burn the eyes. I push her to the ground and pour drinks all over her. Everyone around us, including bouncers, watch in what I'm thinking was amusement. She storms off and I proceed to drink and dance with *C, *Jiji and *Tia. After another fight breaks out the lights turn on and it was time to leave. As I look to the street I see *Lourdes crying and being comforted by *Dina and *Diane. Ugh. I feel so bad. I made my bestfriend cry! Who does that? Everyone decides to meet back at the hood.
*Lourdes and her boyfriend * Carlo never showed up. They have all my things. Clothes. Makeup. Toothbrush! Shit... Anyways, I wake up this morning at 9 after 2 hours of sleep and remembered what happened. I sent Lourdes the following text:
Hey.
I'm really sorry about last night.
Sooo unecessary.
Bff?
Harammm *lourdes!
Now I can't sleep and am wondering how long I can last with only a thong and my Boyfriend's shirt on. I hate this saying, but... FUCK MY LIFE!
Current...
Mood:Guilt
Song:*C's snoring symphony
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